You know those guys that hold the signs or flags at construction sites? The ones that tell you when it is safe to proceed on past them. Well, I’ve always thought that job would be one of the most boring jobs you could have. Some people say that when you’re in a coma, you are actually aware of everything that is going on around you, but you can’t participate in anything. That’s what I think being a flag man is like. Unless.
I had just picked up two friends that I was working with in college, and we were headed to our job. On the way to the job, we had to drive through a neighborhood that was a little rough around the edges. I was driving my parent’s Oldsmobile station wagon because my car was in the shop. As we rolled along down the road I was chatting away with my buddy. I guess the conversation was interesting, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to the road like I should have been. When I looked forward,,,,,, there was a flag man. If this guy’s day had been boring, it wasn’t now. He was jumping up and down and waving that flag like crazy. I’ve never seen someone from a road construction crew move that fast. I realized that probably meant he wanted me to stop, so I slammed on the brakes and my tank of a car lurched to a halt. Whew. The flag guy settled down and regained some of his composure. Eventually it was our turn to go and he waved me on. Crisis averted. Except that one of the cars behind me had a light bar on top, and he had seen the whole thing. When I got through the construction zone, those lights came on.
I dislike being pulled over by the police. I really don’t need that kind of stress in my life. The officer approached my window and asked me some questions.
“Do you know why I pulled you over?”
“I believe I almost ran over the guy with the flag.”
“License and registration please. If I search this car, will I find any drugs or weapons?”
Me nervously laughing, “No.”
Like I said, the area was not great. This was about the time that backup arrived. Yep, backup. I’ve seen myself in the mirror plenty of times. I never thought, “wow that’s a dangerous looking dude.” I usually think things like, “Yeah you can get away with not shaving for another day.” Or, “I wonder if this t-shirt is dressy enough for going to dinner?” Apparently, this officer saw me and my friends and thought. “Oh, I’m gonna need some help to keep these guys under control.” We were all asked to exit the vehicle. We were all patted down. Then we were all asked to sit on the curb while the other officer searched my car. Aside from being embarrassed, I didn’t mind my time on the curb all that much. The weather was nice and it was a relatively comfortable seat. Eventually they let me go with a warning. I really appreciated that.
I learned one thing from all this. I must have the look of a criminal. So, I’ve had to take that into account since then. Now when I look in the mirror in the morning I think things like, “Do these cargo shorts make me look more or less dangerous?” Or, “Will this sweater help to soften my image?”
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